An Ant Pushing Some Water. - Imgur

WHAT ABOUT TURNIP

Which ones should I get?

I had to tilt my head really weird to get rid of the glare so just pretend I'm super fine in both. Which ones do you like better? HALP

From when I was 8 until I was 17 my mother was a professor at a fancy schmancy private art college in the city. I used to love to go into work with her on Fridays, which I would be allowed to do only three or four times a year. We would catch a 5am direct train to Penn Station, grab pineapple and muffins from a cafe nearby, and I would munch on breakfast while watching her ink up test plates and grease up the presses. I loved the black and white checkerboard of the printshop floor, and to be honest I loved the attention I got from everyone there even more. One time, when I was 13 or so, I was wearing my favorite black turtleneck and looking lusty (and busty. My favorite shirt for a reason). I had just come out of the bathroom and my mother was talking to one of her students saying "oh yes, and my daughter is here..." but he seemed busy and preoccupied and didn't really give two shits about her personal life.

Odilon Redon, who my mother would have named me after if I had been a boy.

I was walking from the other direction and our eyes met and it was my first instance of "oh. chemistry." Although I'd been menstruating for three years already, suddenly it was very clear that I had become a woman. It was my first case of being attracted to a man in that sense and it was the first time I'd ever recognized attraction as being mutual. Our jaws mutually dropped and he just smiled reeeeal suavely and held out his hand, to introduce himself. When he told me his name I wasn't listening. I got completely lost in the tight little gap between his front two teeth, his hair that was longer and slightly wavy and perfectly blond.
Karen, you know my type. He personifies it.
Madre ran up and said "this is my daughter!" and he said, completely surprised, "this is your daughter?!"
We had that thing where you walk away from a person and both of you look behind you at the same time. And for a year afterward I had daydreams of living in an apartment with him in St. Mark's Place, holding our little blond baby up to my chest while sitting on a navy and white striped armchair with him looking on adoringly.

Well, after years of not thinking of him once, I suddenly looked him up on facebook.

I found him and, once I get back to NY, I'm going to bang him. I cannot wait.

Beat the dick like a motherfucking drummer chick.


-Camille

In in my imagination I am a warrior princess in a cape riding on a horse with a rugged sack carrying provisions and Turnip is in my lap being protected by me and warning me of predators and we are both princesses who must save the kingdom by completing a vague series of daunting tasks which require us to ride off into the deep and dark forest and battle some shit but we are not scared because we are magic and sometimes I can fly or something and I know how to make a fire and my cloak can be invisible if I want but I'm also wearing a beautiful dress.

And in reality I'm in the kitchen reading my biology textbook and trying to start a paper about my cultural roots and I'm drinking what is supposed to be the most popular tea in English households and I've searched for and bought it because I am susceptible to marketing ploys and Turnip is in my lap protecting me from predators and we've just begun watching Kingdom and we are still princesses.




Karen.

I am watching the Fellowship of the Ring during one of the few times where the electricity is on during semi-waking hours. While trekking in Annapurna earlier this week we assigned everyone their LOTR equivalent with stunning accuracy. When it came time to choose mine there was a quick and unanimous decision that I must be Galadriel, because she knows about the forest, she is cool as a cucumber, and she goes very scarily insane at one point. When she appeared on screen one girl said "oooh yes, that's Camille. Very pretty, very creepy."
I secretly adore it.

Nepal is still fantastic, I cannot even begin to express it.
Trekking warrants rum and hot lemon tea at the end of every hard day.
I also finally mustered up the courage to break up, once and for all, with a man I care for deeply but will never manage to be passionately and madly in love with.

Passion and madness is needed. It is extremely hard, finally closing this chapter and erasing any possible future I could have had with him.
But I am growing happier and happier with my decision with each passing day.

-Camille

Ok well

I like when my cat looks like a ghost. I like that crazy potato, I like when I inadvertently look like a sumo wrestler.